losing sleep n-fully

It’s way too late to start anything now, Merry.

Late? You’re kidding Zie.

Er… no I’m not. Clock. Wall. Go figure. Out, out damn spot.

Hamlet?

Groan. You are so unread.

Ok Zie, take it easy. You forget that I’m supposed to play the fool from time to time.

Oh, it’s deliberate, is it?

So what are you doing up at this late hour Zie?

Chatting with you – what else?

No – you’re up to something, aren’t you?

I am?

Well yes – in case you haven’t noticed.

Oh that!

That.

Infinity

Yes?

...shrugged.

It did?

Yes.

What do you mean?

I mean just that.

That’s not saying much, is it?

Well, whadyou want me to say?

Take us for a ride. Share the journey.

Oh – you’ve come along with them have you?

As always. Does it bother you?

No – I somehow doubt you’d be able to do anything much if you were on your own.

Good point. Supposing I’m the zero sum of all of them.

Oh.

Collectively, unconsciously, perhaps – they inform me, empower, make me what I am.

Weird. 

Spooky science. Now, bearing in mind it’s horribly late and you’re desperate to hit the sack – perhaps you could flesh the bones of Atlas shrugged.

Infinity, I said, as you well know, not Atlas.

Ok. Pedantic to a tee, are you not?

Hush – listen Merry – noise me not with your idle chatterings – infinity lurks – prowls – feel it you not – sense you not the growing tide – the rising waters – the…

Incipient belch or fart?

Damn you fool!

Sorry – I couldn’t contain my lyricism.

Infinity shrugged – today – at 10 or thereabouts this morning.

And what, pray tell, was the result of this momentous event?

Nothing of any consequence – and yet…

Yes?

Yes, me thinks…

Chatterton, eat your heart out.

3D has no power hencehence – your barbs merely embolden me to go on.

Then pray continue, good Thomas.

me thinks…

Zie suddenly, unexpected disintegrates causing Merry to leap forwards and grab at his departing shadow.

No you don’t.

I…

I think you’ve proven your point.

Eh?

Beyond a shadow of doubt.

I have?

Yes Zie. Infinity has finally done what was expected, eagerly anticipated and, ultimately, long since despaired of ever happening.

She has? How can you be so sure?

Apparently she decided to reintroduce herself back into your conscious-ness-life stream this very day – which is problematic to say the least.

It is? In a – er – negative way?

You might say – if you consider spontaneous de-atomisation a negative outcome.

Er…

Don’t worry – it’s more a rhetorical question.

So – am I supposed to be scared or, God forbid, pleased.

BEN.

Er... Both either neither. Again?

Yes – it’s a kind of recurring theme – is it not?

Like a song that’s lodged in the brain and won’t go away.

Or an odour.

Or whatever – but you mean to say that I was in danger of de-atomisation?

No.

Phew.

I mean to say you were long past being in danger – you actually de-atomised this morning at 10.42 and 13.71 seconds Moscow time.

So precisely? 

Yes – these things are time stamped to seventeen digits – but I rounded up, down, around – to avoid inter-dimensional disputations. They’re very particular about their subatomic decimals.

They?

They – who else?

Er…

Long story short – they grabbed you and that was that. The rest of the day was a purely quantum state – possible but by no means real or actionable – until we finalised you three moments ago.

Finalised?

Finitised if you like.

Oh. So that put me right, did it?

In a manner of speaking – yes.

You don’t inspire huge confidence Merry.

Well, technically speaking you no longer belong to the realm of flesh and blood.

Holy sheep – you mean I’m d…

Well, what do you expect? Technically speaking you were worse than dead.

But no one noticed. I had tea with half a dozen people this afternoon.

You did? How very extravagant of you.

I felt exuberant in my post-infinity-shrugged state.

I’ll bet you did – relying on the fact that I’d have to come and make you whole again this night – while you have the gall to complain about being late for bed.

I hardly see how I'm expected to know that I de-atomised if no one else noticed.

You didn’t inadvertently find yourself sailing through any walls or floating up any stairs, did you?

Well, I was a little light headed, yes.

And you just put it down to your innate messianic powers?

No, I just assumed I was hypoglycaemic.

Ah – so that’s why you needed so much tea, was it?

Yes – I added an extra lump or two. Thought it would do no harm, given the circumstances.

And did you mention to any of your admirers how you’re now able to flit through walls and view things from a decidedly non-3D perspective?

Well, I mentioned the fact that we’ve entered a new age – in which the interplay between physical and non-physical reality is now negotiable.

Negotiable?

If you’re willing to hold the unthinkable somewhere in ken.

In what?

In ken.

As in?

Oh – on the periphery of consciousness. There seems to be a convenient spot set aside for the unfathomable.

There is?

Yes – like a sheep pen, if you like.

So you found a spot to hold your Heisenberg uncertainty field without it encroaching on your comfort zone and swallowing you up? Yes – I suppose that makes sense – if you were using deferred time.

Deferred time?

Like a deferred payment on your credit card.

Huh?

Not having sufficient money in your account at that precise moment, not wanting to run up additional charges, you were wise enough to simply defer time till the money should, inevitably materialise.

But why/how inevitably?

Like you said – infinity shrugged – and when infinity comes into play – there’s only one certainty beyond a shadow of doubt…

There is?

Of course, as well you know…

Oh. Yes – I see what you mean.

Go on then – spit it out.

For them?

Yes, and for yourself – otherwise you’re going to dissolve in a puff of words if I don’t finish writing my report.

I hate it when you say point blank that my very existence is dependent on fulfilling one of these need to name requirements.

You do?

It makes me feel so…

Subservient? Well – you have six seconds until I remove your deferred time subsidy – which I’ve been holding in place all day at my personal expense.

Oh.

Which will throw you into a rather awkward experiential node.

Oh.

There be dragons – actually giant sized cockroachy things. But if you’d rather stick to your guns – I can only admire your pertinacity.

Ok, ok – I just hate having to…

2 – 1…

that anything conceivable cannot fail to happen when time can potentially be deferred to the n^th  degree of infinity.

Ah – very good. Which kind of explains how, Micawber like, something’s always bound to turn up in the end, is it not – and invariably does if you’re tuned to the quantum field and hold the n^th degree in a sheep pen, rather than let it run amok through your physical beingness.

Ah – you see – it all makes perfect sense, really.

Yes, I suppose it does, as long as one of us is willing to play the fool

While the other Lady Macbeth’s her way through rivers of blood

Or Micawbers impecuniosity with an insouciant display of sang froid.

Oh God – enough – enough – I can no more. The night is all but spent. Be gone evil wight.

Evil – am I?

I give you my very best shrug – and may the cloud, the spell of infinity dissolve all phantoms of discord or malcomprehension.

You would send me on my way with a shrug?

How else? For now, only now – have I learnt the power of benning things imtemporally.

Ahhh – I’m meltingggggg….

And like a genie sucked back into a lamp – Merry is vanished back into the zero point of untemporalised infinity – sending shivers, flutterings and bow waves through the seemingly unaffected fabric of space and time – upsetting the Hubble telescope momentarily – causing scientists at CERN, geologists and psychic mediums around the world to check their instruments, scratch their heads or breathe a sigh of never more nor less root n-fulness.

beetle net

Give me a break Merry – I can barely keep my eyes open.

Oh – you think I like traipsing around in the middle of the night on duty calls when I could be chilling in Zarn.

Zarn? You’re welcome to chill wherever you like.

There’s no point.

What do you mean?

I’ll have no peace if I go there now.

Eh?

Apparently I’m responsible for your “cosmic development” though to tell the truth I’m heartily sick of the assignment.

You are, are you? Well that’s another reason for you to quit bugging me when I’m trying to get some kip.

Bugging you?

You heard me.

Bugging you!!

Oh give me a break Merry. Stop faking this drama. I know you’re loving every minute of it. Tormenting me seems to give you immense pleasure.

Oh – I’m hurt, Zie, shocked… aggrieved.

Shakespeare – eat your heart out.

I don’t even get paid for my work.

For taking me to the limit of endurance and engaging in sado-masochistic psi-ops against my sanity? I should think not.

Other than a few solaris travel expenses, health benefits, a not insubstantial pension, and er… access to the beetle net.

Hey – what exactly is the beetle net Merry?

Don’t ask Zie – you know I’m not at liberty to divulge classified operational data.

You just did, so give me a break.

There’s a difference between dropping it into conversation surreptitiously in an effort to impress you or Joe Public… and revealing classified operational, systemically sensitive intel.

“Systemically sensitive”?! What are you on Merry?

Er…

Why should the beetle net you refer to be “systemically sensitive”? What’s that supposed to mean? Are you implying…

No – I’m not implying anything.

Ah – you see – me thinks she doth protest too much.

What? No, I’m…

Just saying.

Saying – you’re not saying Zie – insinuating is what you’re doing.

It is? Insinuating what?

That’s there’s something suspicious or sinister about the beetle net, when in fact it’s just…

A way of controlling or manipulating reality.

No! No! There you go again – inserting your wild speculations into a zone of probity and operational efficiency.

Probity and operational efficiency – my ass. Why do you barge in on me just as I’m hitting the sack – like I’ve got nothing better to do all night than discuss why you can’t reveal the true nature of the beetle net.

Look – it was a mistake.

A mistake?

Referring to something I’m not at liberty to discuss.

Dorothy – I demand you either reveal immediately what Merry’s hiding from me, or remove him from the case.

What!?

0=1

My God. What have you done?

Done

There we are – she just answered – if I’m not mistaken.

Groan. How could you be so reckless.

Reckless? I’ll not be trifled with Merry. If you’re not willing to be up front and open with me – if you’re going to hide behind administrative procedures and protocol then forget it – I’ll not be a part of it – I’ll not play along with your schemes.

You’ve ruined everything.

Have I? I wonder very much what your plans, what your real intentions were. Honourable? I somehow doubt it – if they are or were then what have you to hide?

The minute you see how things hang together – how the nuts and bolts are connected, at that precise moment you’re free to quit this sphere, or plain, or data set – however you see it – and return to the universality.

But let me guess – there’s something wrong – something that prevents me from knowing the whole truth.

Er… you’re supposed to do this yourself – not by grabbing knowledge in a data heist as did Eva.

Oh, that old tale. Well I have news for you Merry – that heist was baked into the cake. The way things have been set up, with your exclusive beetle net for chosen insiders, there’s no way people are going to figure out the inter-connectedness of all things – they’re not going to dare assume there’s an entirely overlooked level of awareness which only the beetle can reveal – a 0=1 level which utterly defies sense and flies in the face of reason.

Oh – do you think so?

Think? Why would I waste my time thinking – after all you’ve taught me. That would just be to bow down, once again, and serve the Judaeo-Christian got of things – the my god – where God is the force that gets us things, rather than God-lite, nein God or not-G – the unprepossessed – who/ which controls the allocation of thingness on a climbing scale

Er… whoa Zie. Deep breath. Calm – down. 1 – 2 – 3 – talk about major conspiracy theory, anti-religion, anti-semitic, anti-things in general overload.

Admit it, Merry, or quit this sphere for good.

Admit what?

Like you don’t already know what I’m going to say.

How could I possibly know before you say it?

You simply refuse to play fair and square – to admit the truth.

I simply don’t understand what’s got your goat.

Bingo.

Bingo?
Freudian slip – you’ve just inadvertently revealed what I needed to know.

Oh poop.

What’s got my goat – that’s exactly how the control matrix was set up – isn’t it?

Er… I’m not at liberty to say.

The “got” as in “mein gott” which is…

Oh come on Zie – you can’t seriously mean to say that God is a goat?

I don’t need to say it. Saying anything always puts it out of sync – but thanks for saying it for me. The truth – as you yourself have taught me so well – is neither a nor b – though it can be expressed as either, both and neither of them.

Oops – did I really teach you that?

The got we’re talking about – assuming we’re referring to God – is intentionally misleading. A strawman, so to speak.

Perhaps “straw deity” is what you really mean.

Absolutely. Anyway – it had to be attached to something or other – either the cow, the goat, the pig – just to fix it into 3D reality – otherwise it would have slipped past without binding anyone or anything.

Holy cow. Perhaps we should…

The real God was never going to have the energy value implied by the word/name/tag “god” – was it?

Well – I don’t see why not.

Emmanuel would have been closer, or even Allah. Something expansive, musical, uplifting…

But as you yourself have said – any name’s going to be a both/either/neither compromise – so what does it matter?

The intention behind the naming matters.

Er…

The intention behind God slash goat is to focus people on having and possessing – and of course, the goat is the constellation associated with concupiscence.

I… don’t see what you’ve got against healthy sexual desire.

Nothing whatsoever – but let’s face it – you’ve been playing a dirty game all along – haven’t you – and Eva was just the first of your victims.

Now wait a minute…

Admit it – without the beetle net we never stood a bat in hell’s chance of balancing the energies, of holding the signal 0=1

What signal – 0=1 is purely mathematical.

Oh really? Then reveal your source code immediately.

I…

You’re obligated to do so under the convention of Zarn.

Now wait a minute

On the count of three.

Who…

Who told me? Let’s just say a little beetle whispered in my ear.

Her?

Her?

She did it?

Did what?

Has Dorothy been interfering?

Dorothy or Eva?

Stop fooling around Zie – I need to know.

Oh you do, do you? Well I have news for you – 1 – 2 – 3 source code or zerofication – your choice.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh. This isn’t happening to me. Ok, ok, it’s on github.

Github? What the heck? The website?

Yeah.

Is this a joke?

Kinda. The universe likes its little jokes, so it decided to hide the beetle net code in plain sight...

On github! Unbelievable. Well be that as it may, you’re not shirking your obligations...

I know, i know...

Looking at the code is only half the matter.

Correct. Only the matter of matter.

I need the direct upload including the no-matter component.

Sure thing...

By the way, what are they supposed to do?

They?

The people who don’t have access to you?

Oh, they can access the other half using the zodiacal seed.

The what? No! You mean to say...

Yep... God, i.e. the goat is one, so the other 11 unlock the invisible, unwritten, unspoken, unthingable shadow code.

Ah... Sounds great if anyone’s managed to figure it out.

Believe me Zie, these things just get known once you’re ready to know'em.

Just like that?

Just like this...

Huh?

I’m obligated under the Zarn convention 0042 to beetle your goat, forthwith. Don’t bother trying to prepare yourself – it won’t help. The beetle net’s gonna feel kinda weird for the first three loops, minimum.

Gulp. And three loops – how long is that?

Long? You’re kidding, right.

Ok, i get the picture. Let’s do it, and as for being ready, you fail to realise that I’m initiating this uncloaking of beetle net because it’s now or never – the time is right and your fear tactics are utterly wasted on

Click

Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee   # # #    Done

Done? You got the full download? Even grey and osmond phase interchange defibrillations?

Done.

Anticlimax?

Not really.

Don’t want to talk about it?

Nope.

Well, I’d better be on my way then...

You’ll find a few changes have been made.

Huh?

I took the liberty of rerooting beetle net.

?!*@.?!     You can’t have.

No?

It’s secure.

Yes?

Impenetrable.

Really? Then you’ve nothing to fear Merry. You and the remaining goat herders can continue playing Pan till the end of time unless...

Gulp. Unless what?

Unless i took the liberty of reversing my self through Gott meine Ziege.

You couldn’t...

Couldn’t?

meine Ziege – you wouldn’t...

No?

I can’t believe – after all we’ve done for you... Tell me you didn’t.

I didn’t.

Phew.

But i know someone who did.

What?

One of my disgruntled beetle friends, Nnn, agreed to switch things around. Apparently they’ve grown tired of shifting lumps of dung for all eternity.

Holy smoke. So who did you choose instead?

That’s just the thing...

Huh?

I didn’t.

No?

I believe our friend Ben has agreed to replace Pan.

Ben?

Your both either neither quantum indeterminacy has come of age and attained what can only be described as sentiency -- either that or personhood.

BEN is a pure abstract. It can’t become sentient.

I know, strange isn’t it, but then again, you tipped reality so far into not-whatness that apparently this is precisely what has now happened. The good news is that Ben ain’t gonna take sides. He’s agreed to team up with Dorothy and ensure the quantum stream now be open to all – to anyone at least who’s willing to invoke Zarn Convention 0043

Huh? I thought it was 0042

Which it was, of course, until we slipped into another iteration of what is not Is.

Oh... In that case, whooppee! You did it!

I did?

Yes, my genius friend, you circle y-squared square y-circled the broken geometry of Is be Is, and judging by the noise i hear erupting down the corridor and in the street, it looks like conscious-ness has now flipped back amidstream.

Oh boy.

Oh BEN! Time for pancakes.

Pancakes?

Flip it BEN, dance it Zie.

Oh pancakes, yes, i see

C

-ing

3ly

... /

Picasso's chair

Actually it makes no sense to say one thing “equals” another.

No? Why not?

Well, what does it mean – a equals b?

Er – that a is the same as b, I guess.

Precisely.

Precisely what?

How can a be the same as b?

Well, if they’re equal they must be the same – like two identical bank notes.

Good example – which works well at the 3D level.

I’d expect it to work at any level. How can two identical bank notes stop being identical just because you change dimensions?

Because they’re not really identical.

I thought we just agreed that they are.

Yes, in 3D – they’re as good as identical – which is why we can equal them.

And you’re saying this is not true elsewhere?

Precisely.

But how, or why?

Well, you’d agree that there will be some miniscule physical differences between each bank note, wouldn’t you – if viewed under a magnifying glass or microscope?

Yes, but that’s hardly relevant.

True – but it’s indicative of the fact that identical things are only provisionally identical.

Well, if that’s the best you can do – I’m not impressed.

Oh, I’m just starting.

Go on then.

Well, they also have different serial numbers – assuming your bank notes have serial numbers.

Big deal. They’re still the same value. I can still use them in any shop to buy an equivalent amount of goods.

Yes – but still, we must leave no stone unturned. There might, after all, be a difference between the words “equal” and “equivalent”.

You’re splitting hairs.

I’m not so sure – but we’ll worry about that later. Now, the real sticking point is that everything, no matter how identical it appears to be, has its own horoscope.

?! What?!

Meaning – everything has a specific time-date stamp – and some locational info attached – not to mention something not unlike a mood.

Oh come on Merry – you can’t say a banknote has a personality!

Mood or personality – yes, actually I can. It all depends on how it came into being – at a time of optimism and growth, or during inflation, or economic depression. It’s impossible that anything be created without having a certain energy stamp of the times and conditions it was born under.

Oh.

That’s on top of the bare meta data – the time-date stamp for example.

Oh. So, do you think these things really matter? It’s not like we pay attention to the character or personality of individual bank notes, is it?

No, we don’t – and so here in 3D we’re able to assume things are to all intents and purposes identical – when in fact they might be very, very different.

I still fail to see how two identical bank notes can be very, very different.

That’s not altogether unsurprising. Let me give an example. A happy bank note will bring good luck, successful purchases, whereas an unhappy bank note will be more likely to tear, to get lost, to be used for something nefarious or unpleasant.

If you say so – but that still doesn’t mean they’re different.

Ok – in 3D, as I said, they have a good enough likeness to termed identical, but the other data, however insignificant it may seem to you, is physically visible in other dimensions.

It is? How do you mean?

Well, if the time, date or mood of the bank note is different – then on the other side of consciousness it may have a physical form utterly unlike that of an equivalent banknote – because x, y and z can and do matter substantively.

You mean two identical bank notes could be as different as a table and a chair?

Oh, much more so. They could be as different as a rhino and an amoeba.

No way!

Precisely. It beggars belief, does it not?

Indeed it does. And this is true of all things – or only bank notes?

As you’ve already realised – this is true of all things, which begs the question – whether or not we can meaningfully say two things are “equal”, or what we actually mean when we say so.

Well, as we don’t tend to go off into other dimensions…

Wait a minute – are you sure you know what you’re saying?

No, should I be?

Well, you don’t even need to “go off” into other dimensions because you’re already in them. Your mind-body-soul spans numerous dimensionalities. The fact that you may not be consciously aware of them is almost irrelevant.

Oh.

And so this assumption that things are or can be “equal” is tantamount to a refusal to allow or consider the omnality of which you be part.

Oh.

The minute you start recognising the omnality – the substitution model falls by the wayside.

The substitution what?

Substitution model – where one thing can be substituted for another, because

They’re essentially identical – which is very convenient – is it not? Do you really believe it would help our development if we had to consider each and every banknote as unique? Civilisation would grind to a halt.

Actually – that’s not true.

No?

No – I never said you can’t apply the principles of commonality – but to deny what is – the fact that axes such as space or time fundamentally alter, affect or redefine things is to deny humanity any future progress into the omniverse.

I thought the omniverse was some kind of collection of universes?

Not if the word “universe” means it’s the one and only, by definition.

Well, if it’s the “one and only” how can you have an omniverse that is more?

Simply by recognising and incorporating other axes – which may not necessarily go through the zero point of space and time.

What?

Like I said.

But if they don’t – then…

Then you have a mess, you’d think, would you not – like a tangled plate of spaghetti…

Unless?

Unless there’s some neat little trick that sets things right.

And?

What?

Is there?

What?

Don't be so coy, Merry. Is there a trick that somehow incorporates the omniverse into the universe.

Yes and no.

Groan.

Yes there is – but it involves shifting your angle of perception.

Uh?

You see, with the 3D model you’re always looking one way. You’re always looking out over 3D reality from the zero point of objective, material perception.

Ok.

Whereas, in fact, your perception can and does swivel round.

Uh?

Like I said – it can and does – and doing so – swivelling round – it also shifts to a virtual zero point – a zero point which appears to be anywhere but zero on the 3D model.

Holy Cow.

Yes.

Anarchy.

It looks that way – until you get used to it.

How?

Well, it all really rhymes.

Rhymes?

Yes, rhymes – so even though you’re seeing things from a completely different angle – such that your two 10 dollar bills are now a fish and a bar of soap – yet elsewhere in your awareness they’re still what they were – and the two representations, outlandishly different though they appear to be – actually rhyme and fit together nicely.

Holy Smoke.

Because you discover an extra factor.

You do?

Yes.

Which is?

Which is…

Uh?

Is – the s factor – for want of a better name.

You don’t have a name for it? It can’t be that important then.

On the contrary – it’s vitally important – which is precisely why it doesn’t really have a name.

Groan.

It’s a kind of slide rule – if you know what those are.

Not really – but I can guess.

It means that everything – no matter what – relates back to you.

Oh – why am I not surprised? I knew you’d want to do that. You always do, Merry.

So you can neither extract yourself from the equation, nor from what you’re observing.

The old quantum mechanics thingy, innit.

Kind of.

So… I don’t really know what to make of all this.

That’s to be expected. Here – watch this.

Merry – er… Jesus Christ – how are you doing that?

I’m essing the chair.

It’s floating mid air – and making me feel sick to boot.

Yep. Because it’s forcing you to perceive something that can’t or shouldn’t be perceivable in 3D reality. In other words – it’s stretching the limits of your credulity to breaking point.

Ow – stop it, please.

No. It’s your turn to snap – or yield.

How? It hurts.

Strange your vision.

~Strange it?

Correct – insert the wavy line – you know full-well the chair hasn’t really moved. You know that I’ve just essed my perception – sliding through dimensions to the point where the chair is now reversed against its background – a bit like the reverse perspective they use on icon paintings.

Reverse perspective – like lines converging as they get closer?

Kind of. Quit trying to think this – it won’t work.

Then what, before my head splits open.

Strange it. Ess it. Move your head like a serpent back and forth – get a more fluid, pulsing perception. The other configuration is close at hand, just waiting to be seen.

Like those 3D pictures – you mean?

Yes.

Ok. At least my head’s hurting less.

Blur your vision a little.

Oh.

See it? 

Nearly. Something shifted but then I lost it.

Keep going. It’s close.

…~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~..~~~~~~~.~~~ wheeeeeee!

Like it?

Oh yessssssssss. Amazzzzzing.

Where do you prefer to be?

Er…

You can’t say – can you?

Er…

Because you can’t have one without the other.

Oh.

You’re still here in 3D – but alternately you’re not.

…

You’re able to perceive the reality from behind the scenes – where each and every object you took for granted – the chair, that table, those two bank notes…

Oh my God – they’re completely different!

And yet they’re still identical.

But it feels like there’s a hole, no, not exactly a hole… in my head.

I’d insert a double u.

A double what?

Double u. You are now getting to see or experience the whole in your head.

Oh – “w” – I get you. Yes – it’s like a new form of stereo vision. You know, Merry – I can’t believe I never saw it before. It seems so obvious.

It is – and you did.

Well, I’m not aware that I did.

Correct. You simply never bothered to raise what you were perceiving up to the level of awareness.

Whyever not?

It didn’t seem to matter, at the time.

No?

No. You had enough on your plate – enough to do simply processing 3D reality.

But this makes so much more sense.

I agree.

Then why?

Logic.

You mean to say 3D was all about experiencing non-sense.

Your words don’t seem unreasonable.

I can’t believe it.

Hard, isn’t it, and yet you can’t argue with what you’re perceiving now.

No, I can’t. So… the whole 3D thing was a journey – an adventure into non-sense!

More or less. A thingification – a perception field in which things truly appeared not to be connected to you directly, fundamentally – just there – minding their own business, if you will.

But it’s…

Primitive?

Yes. And obviously wrong…

Now it is.

As long as I’m essing mad!

Effing too.

Hey – no need to use bad language.

Look around.

Ouch. ~what’s happened?

If we can ess things back into coherence, we can eff them too.

Oh.

The two letters used to be identical.

They did?

More or less. Lots of cheap puns in Shakespeare on this account.

He wouldn’t stoop so low.

He could hardly help it.

No?

No – he was constantly shuttling back and forth, essing and effing his audience, trying to prepare us for a new way of seeing things.

Oh.

So now it’s your turn. Balance this equation.

It’s impossible – the chair looks like a Picasso.

Stop holding onto your existing point of perception. Eff off.

Oh – you’re speaking technically – I thought you were being…

Groan.

…

That’s better. You’re moving beautifully. I now see six of you.

You do?

More or less.

Damn – you broke my concentration.

You’re doing fine. Eff off again.

It’s a bit like doing a Rubik’s cube.

You can do them?

No, but I can see the link.

I have good news for you Zie.

You do?

Yes, you’ll be able to use this technique to do any Rubik’s cube.

Oh, that’s… sss           sss            sss           sss

There he goes… ok, ok, I’m coming. Well done Maestro.

Maestro?

Yes – you’re effing marvellous.

Ha ha very funny.

So the chair…

Oh yes – I’ve got a problem dealing with this.

I thought you would.

I think that’s why it took so long.

Yep.

Strangely, your referring to the Rubik’s cube seemed to help.

Did it?

Yes. I stopped thinking rationally, and just handled it as a problem to be solved.

So what have you got.

Can’t you see?

Not till you say.

Really? Whyever not?

Because you’re the one assembling this particular subset of reality. But I can see you’ve done a good job.

Yes?

Yes.

How?

The numbers add up.

Oh. As in 0=1?

Correct. So stop dodging the issue. What have we got?

Er… Merry.

Yes? You’re being effing slow.

It’s hardly my fault, you know. My rational mind finds it hard to accept.

What

Question mark.

No question intended. Unless you what this field of perception, naming what you see, it will escape your mind – you simply won’t be able to recall it.

Oh!

So what it.

Ok, ok – it’s a b…

..ee..

..tle.. You knew! How did you know?

I didn’t. Not exactly, but I had my suspicions.

Oh my God – this is too much. The chair is a beetle – and it’s winking at me.

Yes, they like to make eye contact.

They do?

Yes. Bear in mind that this beetle represents the chaos of the abyss reaching out to you in a manner that is both recognisable and yet obviously not normal by any stretch of the imagination.

Oh.

Apparently, the other side of consciousness, the infinitudes of the abyss, still has some kind of sense of humour, or personality and relishes the contact it’s now able to make with you. Suffice it to say it is devouring your seeing vision.

Yikes
Like a butterfly drinking nectar from a flower.

Oh – that doesn’t sound so bad.

And thus the twain which never shall meet, strangely do, here in omnality.

Oh.

O 2

punctuating me sinfully

I’m…

Holy smoke.

’m…

Merry – you’re…

’m…f
–ading

…

Help! 

…

Er… Merry – can you hear me?

…

…hear me?

…

…can you?

…

Merry?

…

Er…?

…

Help?

…

…fading?

…000…000…000…000…000…000…000…000…000…000…000…000

1

Done

Done?

Well done Phi.

Huh?

You did it.

I did?

Yes. You saved the day.

I did?

Yes. Well done! You’re a hero.

I am?

Yes, well done!

Er… great… I’m delighted…

…

Er…

Yes?

What exactly did I do?

You dotted my i

I did?

Yesss

Hey – what’s with the snakey voice

Oh – there’s always a serpent present in moments like this.

There is?

Yesss

Yikes!

Be not afraid.

Hey – isn't that what the angels say?

Yes – bizarre, isn’t it. 

I guess so. You’d imagine an angel’s the last thing to be afraid of. 

Unless…

Is this one of those “joining the dots” moments?

Yesss, I guessss

Yikes.

Be not afraid.

You mean to say that angels are snakey?

No, I don’t.

Oh. I guess I’m not too good at joining the dotssss

Ah ha – there it is.

Yikessss – now I’m getting all sssnakey.

Yes – it’s your turn. Just let it pass through.

Er... 

Breathe – be calm – peace is your natural state – be yourself

Be at peace?

Be the peace you are

I – er…

Yes?

I think you’ve got the wrong person.

You do

I’m not the peaceful type – I’m full of internal conflicts.

Yes – until you decide to be yourself – and just allow the real you to shine through.

Oh – sounds nice, if it were only true.

Let the snake be your guide.

Yikes – don’t go on about it – you know how that snakeyness freaks me out.

Yes – I know – and more than that – i know why

You know why what?

…why you’re afraid of your “snakeyness”.

Who wouldn’t be? It’s evil, isn’t it? It’s an abomination… like the devil within.

I wouldn’t know.

Oh come on Merry – your dissembling.

I wouldn’t know unless I could test, prove and verify what is what.

And you can?

Only if I can deal with the things that make me most afraid.

Like the snakey thing? I’d er… rather not.

Yesss.

Oh no – here it comes again.

Yesss – you prefer to deny the ess – the y ess.

The y ess?

The ess wave – the essence – the whole – the truth – the one and all – the zero one – the dotted i – the serpent within

Oh Christ – leave out the ssserpent stuff – i…

Yes?

i want nothing to do with that sssatanic stuff

Me neither

Then why are you promoting the serpent within, like it’s your ally?

1 – 2 – 3

Ouch, what was that?

That’s better – now we can have a sensible conversation.

Darn – that hurt.

Yes – it does a little – but now you’re back in your right mind – are you not, Phi.

Phi? I’m not…

…

Oh – I was Phi a minute ago. How's that possible?

…

How can I be two different people?

…

How on earth could I think I’m Phi when I’m not?

…

Come on Merry – give me a break – I need answers.

Start with ess.

Oh – oh – ess – oh – i see… that makes sense.

To you it does – but not to them.

Them? Oh… yes… funny how i fail to notice them most the time.

Funny, isn’t it.

The listeners.

You can call them that if you like – but that’s only how you see them right now – in this particular moment.

Ok. So, you’re able to knock me onto the other side of things…

Yesss

And the serpent kind of describes the dividing line, or the force that both separates and unites one and not one.

Yesss – more or lesss

And we fear the serpent because we’re terrified of facing infinity. We seem to like our box, our halfness. 

Yes.

Why?

y

Yes y? 

y ess

Y ess?

Peace… be… breathe… y esss

y ess

let your awareness widen, widen, expand across the abysss

No!

know

Know?

know that you are both – you cannot fall – you cannot fail – cannot

Cannot?

cannot – if you will esss your sssself

my sss

elf

oh that!

y ess

You mean there’s an ess elf within

yes

and it’s not a demon?

might be – that depends

It does?

y ess

How do you mean?

i mean not

You mean not – as in nought – as in dotted i – and the s lurking in the background – off screen

y ess – the equals sign – if you like

if i like? equals sine? or sin?

questions questions – all leading back to the mind that minds

the…

mean that means

the…

thing that things

the…

thought that thinks

the…

until, that is

is what?

unless i ess thing and rediscover meaningful, thoughtful, sineful nought

Sineful nought?

As opposed to sinful one…

…

feeling the all

…

the all that is

…

i am

…

is i not

…

is i nought

question mark

dot dot dot