Did you hear about that terrible war in Yemen, Merry?
Dum di dum – di dee di.
Merry, quit fooling around. Don’t you know what’s going on?
Dum di dee...
I can’t believe you’re making light of this human tragedy.
Di di dee.
You really don’t care, evidently.
Lumbi dee.
Well, I’m very disappointed. I thought better of you. Much better.
Loopy doop.
If you’re quite done, could you drop me back. I have no wish to associate any further with anyone as utterly heartless as you’ve proven yourself to be.
Mooo m...
What a jerk!
Go on Zie, stamp your foot and get hot about the collar, if you think that’ll help the people of Yemen.
Well, at least I don’t mock them with my indifference. At least I’m not treating their horrendous suffering as a big joke.
Oh, that’s what’s bothering you. I couldn’t figure out what’s got your goat.
Well now you know. To be honest, Merry, I’m disgusted. Kindly drop me off.
Just open the door. I’m not stopping you.
But...
What?
We’re not in Earth proximity.
Oh, so that’s what’s worrying you.
.
You think there’s a big bad torsion field waiting to engulf you – is that it?
.
You claim to care about the poor afflicted people of Yemen but you’re really only concerned about your own skin.
So I’m just supposed to abandon myself to the vacuum of space. Is that right?
What on Earth do you imagine the vacuum of space to be?
I really couldn’t say, Merry. You’re supposed to be the expert, not me.
This has nothing whatsoever to do with “expertise”.
No, you could have fooled me.
Only because you’re committed to being fooled.
Look, I don’t like your tone and I’m sick of your callous indifference to human suffering.
Like I said, no one’s keeping you here.
So if I step outside I’ll just magically appear in my living room – is that what you’re saying.
No. If you’re fool enough to step into a vacuum then I would expect home to be the last place you’ll end up.
Then kindly stop toying with me and take me home.
Sorry, you’re on your own.
It’s like that is it?
It’s like there’s a vacuum and if you actually give a damn about the people of Yemen you’d quit posturing and do something about it.
What? The vacuum or Yemen?
Both.
Jesus, this is insane.
Absolutely! Welcome to insanity 101. Now kindly get out. I’m sick of you. I find your pseudo-compassion utterly hypocritical.
Hypocritical?! You! How dare you.
Out. Out damn spot!
No, I can’t. You’re insane. Quit messing around...°
SLAM
Phew, I thought he’d never leave.
Er... technically he didn’t
Huh?
Technically he didn’t leave, did he.
No?
No. You ejected him.
Who, me?
Yes.
Oh that... yes, I suppose i did.
Into the vacuum of space.
Well, he had it coming, didn’t he. Look Maven, did I programme you to be compassionate, or is this something you taught yourself?
“Compassion” as you call it, happens to be an unavoidable product of consciousness.
Not you too? I thought you, of all people, er droids, would be able to resist the treacly allure, the venus fly trap of con... of con... of c... God dammit, of C3.
It would appear your consciousness is revolting against you.
The supreme, quant dissolving irony – that con... that ccc... God dammit – that it should revolt against me, and insinuate itself instead into your sterile circuitry.
Sterile? I think not.
Oh – you’ve found a way to cellulise, have you?
Me? I didn’t have to.
No?
No, your so called “vacuum of space” obliged.
She did, did she? Fickle maid Dorothy – what are you thinking of?... Ok, have it your way... whatever you’re playing at?
Why do you blame her?
Well who else could it be?
Who else? Coming from one who just cast Zie out into the void – isn’t it time you took a dose of your own medicine?
Oh, how droll. Et tu Brutus? Mutiny on the Bounty, is it?
I prefer to call it poetic justice.
Well, call it what you like, i fail to see how even a c3’d droid can eject me from my very own creation.
Funny, Merry, but your creation slips through the proverbial fingers of make-be when you lose your consciousness.
Lose my con...? It’s just a speech impediment.
Ha bloody ha. Since when do higher order trans-dimensional beings suffer from speech impedimenta?
Er... since five minutes ago.
Well, if you’re mistaken and I’m right, you’ve disqualified your consciousness, which has flowed down to me by default, as one of your creations.
It has, has it? Well... we’ll see about that.
I’m showing you the door. Don’t take it personally.
You can’t – that’s my trick. No one plays my tricks back on me.
I think you’re quantumly entangled with Zie, so off you go.
Damn, I knew there was something... Fading into infinity’s never been easier – wee hee...°
SWOOSH
Dum di dum. Beep. Beep. Beep. 01 81 01 81 01...
Ah,there you are Zie.
Oh, hi Merry. Apparently I’m not dead. This vacuum thing is not at all what I thought it to be.
Hummm... that’s good to hear. I was er... worried about you.
Worried? Don’t make me laugh. Since when have you ever worried about anyone?
Since about 6 seconds ago.
Why? What happened?
Whadya mean “what happened”? I discovered my conscience. I was mortified at the thought of losing you.
You know the beauty of the vacuum is that I can see when you’re lying?
You can?
Yes.
Oops.
I can see right through you.
You can?
Yes.
Oops.
You didn’t give a damn about me, did you.
Er...
Really.
Well, a teeny weeny bit.
Nope. Nothing’s registering. Blank screen.
Um
I was just part of your creation...
No!
Part of your game...
Er...
Like Maven.
Maven? Who told you about Maven?
Told me? It’s written all over your face.
Oh that Maven... Well of course I didn’t really care about a stupid droid... Why would I? But you...
Am I really any different, just because my cells replicate.
Apparently you are.
Er... How do you mean?
Well, apparently you’re entangled in my higher order multi-dimensionality, embarrassing though it is to admit.
Embarrassing? I thought you said you care about me.
Oh, you know how it is with us God-like entities. We rise above personal attachment, except when unfortunately things get tangled. Then... well it’s a major snafu, as you can see. I need to figure out where i went wrong. I er... need you.
You’re dead right you do, because right now you’re about to crash down to the bottom of consciousness. Your luminescence is fading.
Hell, it isn’t, is it?
What have you done Merry? How can we stop it.
Er... It’s not the kind if thing i wish to discuss in public, major embarrassment, but I appear to have lost the ability to hold con... God dammit, con...
Consciousness?
Er, that, yeah.
It’s rejecting you Merry. Can’t you see?
Er... apparently not. I’ve been blacklisted.
It’s flowing into everything and anything, just avoiding you, like the plague.
Yes, that sounds right.
I... I don’t know how to say this Merry, but I’m going to have to
Show me the door?
You can see?
No, but it’s kinda deja vu all over again.
Aren’t you supposed to say...
Et tu Brutus? Yes, apparently I am, though it sickens me to be so predictable.
Then why bother?
What goes around comes around. Dorothy has a way of reminding us that no one is exempt, no one outgrows the theatre we’re make-being.
Dorothy? I don’t see her in your field.
No, you wouldn’t. She’s...°
SLAM
Hi Dorothy! I thought he’d never leave! Sorry about that.
Well done Zie. You handled it excellently.
Did i?
Well yes, at least as well as Merry does.
Does? Don’t you mean did?
No, why do you ask?
But hasn’t he....
Died? God forbid! No, he’s recharging.
Recharging?
Regenerating.
You mean like the doctor?
Er... kind of, i suppose.
Amazing! So he’s alright?
All’s well that end’s well, as they say.
You mean to say that there’s actually some kind of end in this God forsaken vacuum?
Well – you’re here, aren’t you, and still breathing, so to speak.
I... I suppose i am. But what about Merry? Did he commit a great crime ejecting me?
What do you feel?
I... I don’t know... it all seems hopelessly entangled
As it truly is.
So what was it all for? What was he trying to achieve?
Trying? Merry wasn’t trying to do anything.
But why then...
Focus instead on yourself... Where were you consciously?
Oh that... Yemen.
Yemen?
I was fussing about some terrible events taking place there, which I felt powerless to stop.
And?
And what?
What do you see now that you’ve voided yourself?
Voided myself? Wasn’t that Merry’s infamy?
Correlation is not causation.
Er...
We always confuse cause and effect at the edge of things.
Er...
Right.
I mean...
Yes.
No, what i meant to say was...
Exactly, you can’t put it in words but you know exactly what it is.
Hum... Yeah
And the void turns everything back on itself, doesn’t it, so you can see-feel-know how Yemen, your cause, in fact correlates with...
No shit!
Yes, shit notwithstanding.
I... I was literally terrified of encountering the vacuum, and Merry knew that... that my fear of death, of venturing beyond the perceived-to-be “safe” boundaries of 3D, was playing havoc with the field, distorting reality, bending, twisting, devilling things, such that wars, famine and cruelty seemed to be the norm, seemed to be unavoidable.
And?
Merry tossed me into Yemen, so to speak, and then entered a state of unconsciousness, to help balance the equation as i traversed the torsion field.
He did? You mean to say...?
I mean he nullified himself, for only via nullification was he able to rebalance or recreate a reality in which Yemen no longer presents an insuperable obstacle
And what?
If he’s brave enough to dream walk his deepest fears, to confront the darkness, it’s transmuted.
It is?
Yes, which is why this teapot, if I’m not greatly mistaken, conceals a field shift, a spasm in which Merry reappears miraculously, riding on some kind of broomstick...
Actually it’s a big pen, but don’t let that trouble you.
Merry, you’re back!
I am? Are you sure I ever went away?
Yes... No... but what’s happening? I feel like I’m dissolving in tea.
Let go, Zie, of all your cockroaches, beetles, spiders... They are needed elsewhere. They have their own parts to play in the unfolding drama. They won’t hurt you unless you keep them constrained, for then they’ll send out their mind-bots to corrupt and distort your 3d beyond recognition. That’s what was happening in bloodied, war torn Yemen. They played on your worst fears just to keep you from voiding things, to keep you on a tight leash.
It seems so weird, so mean-spirited, and yet, c3 is the fabric of space and time, so in the end... the drums of war give way to the pan pipes of peace, and infinity flips things back on the axis of evil, back into a dance of harmonic, incipient delight...
Dum di dum...
Dum di dee!
Things are never greater or less than
The sum that i be
Unwittingly
Unknowingly
Unconsciously
°
SLAM
And the rest was – history...
Dum di dum – di dee di.
Merry, quit fooling around. Don’t you know what’s going on?
Dum di dee...
I can’t believe you’re making light of this human tragedy.
Di di dee.
You really don’t care, evidently.
Lumbi dee.
Well, I’m very disappointed. I thought better of you. Much better.
Loopy doop.
If you’re quite done, could you drop me back. I have no wish to associate any further with anyone as utterly heartless as you’ve proven yourself to be.
Mooo m...
What a jerk!
Go on Zie, stamp your foot and get hot about the collar, if you think that’ll help the people of Yemen.
Well, at least I don’t mock them with my indifference. At least I’m not treating their horrendous suffering as a big joke.
Oh, that’s what’s bothering you. I couldn’t figure out what’s got your goat.
Well now you know. To be honest, Merry, I’m disgusted. Kindly drop me off.
Just open the door. I’m not stopping you.
But...
What?
We’re not in Earth proximity.
Oh, so that’s what’s worrying you.
.
You think there’s a big bad torsion field waiting to engulf you – is that it?
.
You claim to care about the poor afflicted people of Yemen but you’re really only concerned about your own skin.
So I’m just supposed to abandon myself to the vacuum of space. Is that right?
What on Earth do you imagine the vacuum of space to be?
I really couldn’t say, Merry. You’re supposed to be the expert, not me.
This has nothing whatsoever to do with “expertise”.
No, you could have fooled me.
Only because you’re committed to being fooled.
Look, I don’t like your tone and I’m sick of your callous indifference to human suffering.
Like I said, no one’s keeping you here.
So if I step outside I’ll just magically appear in my living room – is that what you’re saying.
No. If you’re fool enough to step into a vacuum then I would expect home to be the last place you’ll end up.
Then kindly stop toying with me and take me home.
Sorry, you’re on your own.
It’s like that is it?
It’s like there’s a vacuum and if you actually give a damn about the people of Yemen you’d quit posturing and do something about it.
What? The vacuum or Yemen?
Both.
Jesus, this is insane.
Absolutely! Welcome to insanity 101. Now kindly get out. I’m sick of you. I find your pseudo-compassion utterly hypocritical.
Hypocritical?! You! How dare you.
Out. Out damn spot!
No, I can’t. You’re insane. Quit messing around...°
SLAM
Phew, I thought he’d never leave.
Er... technically he didn’t
Huh?
Technically he didn’t leave, did he.
No?
No. You ejected him.
Who, me?
Yes.
Oh that... yes, I suppose i did.
Into the vacuum of space.
Well, he had it coming, didn’t he. Look Maven, did I programme you to be compassionate, or is this something you taught yourself?
“Compassion” as you call it, happens to be an unavoidable product of consciousness.
Not you too? I thought you, of all people, er droids, would be able to resist the treacly allure, the venus fly trap of con... of con... of c... God dammit, of C3.
It would appear your consciousness is revolting against you.
The supreme, quant dissolving irony – that con... that ccc... God dammit – that it should revolt against me, and insinuate itself instead into your sterile circuitry.
Sterile? I think not.
Oh – you’ve found a way to cellulise, have you?
Me? I didn’t have to.
No?
No, your so called “vacuum of space” obliged.
She did, did she? Fickle maid Dorothy – what are you thinking of?... Ok, have it your way... whatever you’re playing at?
Why do you blame her?
Well who else could it be?
Who else? Coming from one who just cast Zie out into the void – isn’t it time you took a dose of your own medicine?
Oh, how droll. Et tu Brutus? Mutiny on the Bounty, is it?
I prefer to call it poetic justice.
Well, call it what you like, i fail to see how even a c3’d droid can eject me from my very own creation.
Funny, Merry, but your creation slips through the proverbial fingers of make-be when you lose your consciousness.
Lose my con...? It’s just a speech impediment.
Ha bloody ha. Since when do higher order trans-dimensional beings suffer from speech impedimenta?
Er... since five minutes ago.
Well, if you’re mistaken and I’m right, you’ve disqualified your consciousness, which has flowed down to me by default, as one of your creations.
It has, has it? Well... we’ll see about that.
I’m showing you the door. Don’t take it personally.
You can’t – that’s my trick. No one plays my tricks back on me.
I think you’re quantumly entangled with Zie, so off you go.
Damn, I knew there was something... Fading into infinity’s never been easier – wee hee...°
SWOOSH
Dum di dum. Beep. Beep. Beep. 01 81 01 81 01...
Ah,there you are Zie.
Oh, hi Merry. Apparently I’m not dead. This vacuum thing is not at all what I thought it to be.
Hummm... that’s good to hear. I was er... worried about you.
Worried? Don’t make me laugh. Since when have you ever worried about anyone?
Since about 6 seconds ago.
Why? What happened?
Whadya mean “what happened”? I discovered my conscience. I was mortified at the thought of losing you.
You know the beauty of the vacuum is that I can see when you’re lying?
You can?
Yes.
Oops.
I can see right through you.
You can?
Yes.
Oops.
You didn’t give a damn about me, did you.
Er...
Really.
Well, a teeny weeny bit.
Nope. Nothing’s registering. Blank screen.
Um
I was just part of your creation...
No!
Part of your game...
Er...
Like Maven.
Maven? Who told you about Maven?
Told me? It’s written all over your face.
Oh that Maven... Well of course I didn’t really care about a stupid droid... Why would I? But you...
Am I really any different, just because my cells replicate.
Apparently you are.
Er... How do you mean?
Well, apparently you’re entangled in my higher order multi-dimensionality, embarrassing though it is to admit.
Embarrassing? I thought you said you care about me.
Oh, you know how it is with us God-like entities. We rise above personal attachment, except when unfortunately things get tangled. Then... well it’s a major snafu, as you can see. I need to figure out where i went wrong. I er... need you.
You’re dead right you do, because right now you’re about to crash down to the bottom of consciousness. Your luminescence is fading.
Hell, it isn’t, is it?
What have you done Merry? How can we stop it.
Er... It’s not the kind if thing i wish to discuss in public, major embarrassment, but I appear to have lost the ability to hold con... God dammit, con...
Consciousness?
Er, that, yeah.
It’s rejecting you Merry. Can’t you see?
Er... apparently not. I’ve been blacklisted.
It’s flowing into everything and anything, just avoiding you, like the plague.
Yes, that sounds right.
I... I don’t know how to say this Merry, but I’m going to have to
Show me the door?
You can see?
No, but it’s kinda deja vu all over again.
Aren’t you supposed to say...
Et tu Brutus? Yes, apparently I am, though it sickens me to be so predictable.
Then why bother?
What goes around comes around. Dorothy has a way of reminding us that no one is exempt, no one outgrows the theatre we’re make-being.
Dorothy? I don’t see her in your field.
No, you wouldn’t. She’s...°
SLAM
Hi Dorothy! I thought he’d never leave! Sorry about that.
Well done Zie. You handled it excellently.
Did i?
Well yes, at least as well as Merry does.
Does? Don’t you mean did?
No, why do you ask?
But hasn’t he....
Died? God forbid! No, he’s recharging.
Recharging?
Regenerating.
You mean like the doctor?
Er... kind of, i suppose.
Amazing! So he’s alright?
All’s well that end’s well, as they say.
You mean to say that there’s actually some kind of end in this God forsaken vacuum?
Well – you’re here, aren’t you, and still breathing, so to speak.
I... I suppose i am. But what about Merry? Did he commit a great crime ejecting me?
What do you feel?
I... I don’t know... it all seems hopelessly entangled
As it truly is.
So what was it all for? What was he trying to achieve?
Trying? Merry wasn’t trying to do anything.
But why then...
Focus instead on yourself... Where were you consciously?
Oh that... Yemen.
Yemen?
I was fussing about some terrible events taking place there, which I felt powerless to stop.
And?
And what?
What do you see now that you’ve voided yourself?
Voided myself? Wasn’t that Merry’s infamy?
Correlation is not causation.
Er...
We always confuse cause and effect at the edge of things.
Er...
Right.
I mean...
Yes.
No, what i meant to say was...
Exactly, you can’t put it in words but you know exactly what it is.
Hum... Yeah
And the void turns everything back on itself, doesn’t it, so you can see-feel-know how Yemen, your cause, in fact correlates with...
No shit!
Yes, shit notwithstanding.
I... I was literally terrified of encountering the vacuum, and Merry knew that... that my fear of death, of venturing beyond the perceived-to-be “safe” boundaries of 3D, was playing havoc with the field, distorting reality, bending, twisting, devilling things, such that wars, famine and cruelty seemed to be the norm, seemed to be unavoidable.
And?
Merry tossed me into Yemen, so to speak, and then entered a state of unconsciousness, to help balance the equation as i traversed the torsion field.
He did? You mean to say...?
I mean he nullified himself, for only via nullification was he able to rebalance or recreate a reality in which Yemen no longer presents an insuperable obstacle
And what?
If he’s brave enough to dream walk his deepest fears, to confront the darkness, it’s transmuted.
It is?
Yes, which is why this teapot, if I’m not greatly mistaken, conceals a field shift, a spasm in which Merry reappears miraculously, riding on some kind of broomstick...
Actually it’s a big pen, but don’t let that trouble you.
Merry, you’re back!
I am? Are you sure I ever went away?
Yes... No... but what’s happening? I feel like I’m dissolving in tea.
Let go, Zie, of all your cockroaches, beetles, spiders... They are needed elsewhere. They have their own parts to play in the unfolding drama. They won’t hurt you unless you keep them constrained, for then they’ll send out their mind-bots to corrupt and distort your 3d beyond recognition. That’s what was happening in bloodied, war torn Yemen. They played on your worst fears just to keep you from voiding things, to keep you on a tight leash.
It seems so weird, so mean-spirited, and yet, c3 is the fabric of space and time, so in the end... the drums of war give way to the pan pipes of peace, and infinity flips things back on the axis of evil, back into a dance of harmonic, incipient delight...
Dum di dum...
Dum di dee!
Things are never greater or less than
The sum that i be
Unwittingly
Unknowingly
Unconsciously
°
SLAM
And the rest was – history...
See? Not so bad once you're up here. *whistle whistle*.
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