Chapter 7 - in which I discover what is

When Gill has got her breath back she resumes her discourse... “Faery gives us direct access to “that which is” so we no longer need to waste our time trying to define or explain things. Things are things... zombie land – don’t go there unless you want to say goodbye to Faerie and become a servant of the thing machine we call “reality”...

Gill chats on for a minute or two, and I'm content to hear the rise and fall of her voice – and whatever she is saying seems to make perfect sense.

“Suffice it to say that nothing can really make sense,” she concludes, “until you understand the basis... the simple truth...”

“Which is?”

“Correct. Which is... Is.”

For a second I flinch at the intellectual profundity of what is going through my alpha mind – snatches of lost wisdom and forgotten, concealed or deliberately distorted truths... and yet with a kind of wild abandonment another me is elated, like a surfer riding an impossibly big wave or a guppy fish out-swimming the mother of all sharks. I’m still able to feel bodily the floating-falling sensation I experienced watching Gill hovering between wing beats a few moments ago.

I’m suddenly acutely aware of I-mind struggling to get a handle on this, trying to understand, to explain... until I let go, knowing it’s futile – the 3D mind cannot go beyond what matters.

“Yes, it takes some getting used to,” Gill looks at me sympathetically, almost tenderly for a minute as I let it all sink in, as I feel myself gently rising and falling on the quantum tide of consciousness.

“Away with the faeries...” I think to myself, “I must be losing it...” but I know that I’m not.

Gill brings me back down again with a big grin and “Welcome to the Real world Josh.”

“Oh my God,” I think, “it sounds like the Matrix movie.”

Gill giggles – “Yes it’s unavoidable. Art and life are interwoven. Your limited reality is at the end of its cycle so one by one you’re all awakening. That film was part of the process.”

“Ok,” I reason, “so if Faery is reality with a capital R, then what’s g-nome – sounds a bit like “genome”. Is it connected to DNA?”

“Yes, of course. Everything’s connected. These words are no exception. There’s masses and masses of code in your DNA which isn’t simply biological landscape design, but enables your conscious-awareness to start perceiving what otherwise would be invisible or non-existent. That’s why with g-nome largely disconnected, Faery’s been a kind of fairytale for most people. With a few exceptions, only children have been able to access it and their ability to do so usually shuts down when they start attending school.”

“Ah...”

“Yes, isn’t it just! Big, long, Aaah...!” Gill smiles.

“Wait a minute, how can I see you smile – you’re just a beetle?”

“Do you know many beetles called Gill?” she asks.

“Can’t say I do,” I reply, “in fact, you’re the first,” which sets my mind in motion. Wheels start turning, thoughts flowing and pieces of the puzzle clicking together... “So you’re not just a beetle...” I surmise with a surprising degree of certainty.

“And you’re not just a human” she replies, with a twinkle in her eye. “As Faery opens wider and g-nome is reactivated you stop needing to define beings or things in terms of their race or species. Conscious-awareness is like a quantum stream and we’re able to move throughout, no longer bound by one particular shape or form.”

“So are you beetle by choice or by design?”

“I’ll tell you what, I’ll let you answer that question yourself as soon as you’re ready, but to do so you’ll need to get some rest and assimilate a lot of information that your mind is now downloading and absorbing. It’s going to take a while before it feels comfortable.”

“One more question,” I ask... “Am I going to have a lot more insects popping through my forehead?”

“Are you sure that’s what has been happening? It doesn’t sound very rational,” she smiles.

“Well, I hear this little crack and then there’s an insect nearby and my beetle mark is suddenly prominent, so yes, I put two and two together...”

“And got four, but in Faery you can just as easily get five or some other number.”

“So to answer my question?”

“Does it particularly bother you having insects appearing in this way?”

“No, but it’s a little disconcerting?”

“Unfamiliar, you mean. Almost everything about Faery is unfamiliar, particularly at the stage you’re now at. You were living in isolation, quarantined from other realities, from the vast multiversality of Is, and now you’re beginning to experience how they’re all connected. Every time one of these creatures teleports with you as intermediate, they pay for the service with a little information, a little packet of awareness, so to answer your question – yes, if you continue to give your energetic consent, Faery will continue the process of your reconnection and reintegration.”

“So I’m definitely consenting, you’re saying, even though I’m not aware of it?”

“Without a doubt. Without consent nothing can happen.”

“And the part of me that’s consenting is compos mentis?”

“Of sound mind – yes – except it isn’t a “part of you” as you put it.”

“No? I thought you said...”

“It isn’t a “part of you” that’s taking control. It’s the whole of you – the “All that I am, the multi-dimensional Self”.

“Oh!”

“You see Josh – “Faery” doesn’t refer to a magic kingdom or a piece of the jigsaw puzzle. It’s the whole, the so-called “Be all and end all”, which means that any decision you make regarding Faery can only happen at the highest level of your being... But don’t take my word for it, test it and decide for yourself if it’s true or not, because you can only proceed if you pass the Reality test by accepting what is.”

“What is?” It seems so vague. My mind starts looking for something to hold onto.

Yep, simply what is, nothing more, nothing less.

“Oh!”