sun and earth

 

I’m not connected to it. This is absurd.

 

Ok. You’re not. That’s true.

 

(exasperated) Then why bother saying I am?

 

Because I was speaking fundamentally. You’re speaking personally.

 

Er…

 

Fundamentally you are directly plugged into the sun, and the sun that you see is like a fibreoptic cable that comes right into you – though you don’t see the wire. Personally, on the other hand, your person – the regular me that’s busily living its life in this reality – assumes that the sun is a thing in the sky – millions of miles away – provider of light and warmth but in no way physically connected – and that too is true. It ain’t – not to the person. Not in 3D reality.

 

Just in your airy-fairy wishy-washy realm of oneness.

 

Not exactly, no. I mean – there’s nothing airy-fairy about hard science.

 

Hard science! Give me a break! You’re forever spouting shit about conscious-awareness and other me’s – but they’re just theories of yours – or fantasies.

 

Ah. Yes, well the person struggles with non-physicality, doesn’t it, until it experiences at first hand the connections.

 

At first hand? You think you can just connect directly into the sun?

 

Not unless I’m first safely grounded in the Earth – otherwise I’m gonna burn out, aren’t I?

 

I wouldn’t know Merry – I’ve never done any of this shit, and frankly I don’t want to. It’s pathetic the way you’re always running away from reality into your imaginary world of cosmic connections – as if you’re desperate to imagine you’re at the very centre of the entire universe, and not just a regular player in a vast, impersonal reality show.

 

Yes, that would be rather pathetic of me, wouldn’t it?

 

Why yes, I suppose it would, though I have not the least intent to put you down in any way whatsoever.

 

Uh huh.

 

I merely reserve for myself the right to remain committed to reality, no matter how insignificant it may imply I be.

 

There’s nothing wrong with being committed to the five senses as you are. They’re there for a reason. They give you a perfectly reasonable impression and experience of reality until you start observing and analysing the data a little more circumspectly.

 

What do you mean “circumspectly”?

 

The mind, like the eyes, looks at the biggest square – follows the main story which is always more compelling, but at the edges things get blurred or frayed. The rational mind conveniently puts that down to edginess – or the nature of things.

 But not yours.

 

Well, mine did too for a while, until I realised that the five senses were failing to account for a bunch of experiences, or a bunch of phenomena which are demonstrably real, true and valid – so I suddenly started paying more attention to the blurred or frayed edges – to the things I’d been ignoring or overlooking, as confirmation bias is wont to do.

 

You mean you became an out and out conspiracy theorist.

 

Actually no, not at all.

 

Paf!

 

I became a conspiracy analyst. I started looking more critically at what I’d been deliberately ignoring. I’m not the only one, so it wasn’t terribly difficult to find an almost embarrassing wealth of information.

 

Much of which is utter garbage.

 

Yes, there’s plenty of garbage – as you’d expect in any mining operation – but that doesn’t stop you as long as 10, 5 or even 2% is gold

 

Paf!

 

In any case – I’m not interested in theories Malcolm.

 

No? You could have fooled me.

 

Only verifiable, demonstrable science.

 

Demonstrable?! You mean you’re about to plug into the sun?

 

Sure, why not.

 

Give me a break!

 

Well it wouldn’t be science if I couldn’t conduct experiments and repeat my findings, would it?

 

Please don’t presume to use the word science in this context. It’s frankly stomach churning.

 

So you have no desire to verify my findings?

 

That you’re connected to the sun?

 

That we all are – if we agree to reactivate the connection – if we agree to go beyond the five senses.

 

Activating another five perhaps? Ridiculous!

 

Well, no one’s going to force you to participate against your will. It would be pointless attempting to do so. The mind, after all, is a very delicate instrument.

 

Well what exactly are you proposing to demonstrate?

 

The fact that we have two states of connectedness.

 

Two states – like on and off.

 

Yup.

 

And you can switch between them?

 

Yup.

 

And doing so connect with the sun?

 

Yup.

 

And what then?

 

I’d like you to observe – if you would.

 

Ok. As long as I can do so scientifically – with cameras filming the whole thing.

 

Sure. Let’s make it as scientific as possible. Let’s add a few more instruments for good measure.

 

Like what?

 

Measuring electro-magnetic field strength, background radiation, radiowaves, x-rays, infrared, UV, non-audible sound waves at both ends of the spectrum…

 Anything else?

 

Anything you can think of?

 

We could run an EEG on you at the same time.

 

An electroencephalogram. Good idea. That way we can track what, if anything, unusual is going on in my brain, and yours too, if you like.

 

Mine? What have I got to do with it?

 

Well, entrainment.

 

Huh?

 

Supposing my brainwaves shift in some way – yours might be affected too, mightn’t they?  The observer is never, perhaps, quite as neutral or detached as he likes to think he is.

 

And you just happen to have all this equipment lying around?

 

No. I’ve been using it all while doing my preliminary research.

 

You have?

 

Well yes. How else would I be able to separate fact from self-suggestion? I’m hardly going to want to allow my mind to enter an altered state and fool me into believing something is actually happening when it might just be a shift in my internal brainwave activity affecting my purely subjective perception of reality.

 

Ah. I see.

 

Shall we proceed?

 

If you’re ready.

 

If you are too.

 

Sure, fire ahead.

 

Half an hour later everything has been set up satisfactorily. The machinery and computers are all ready to catch what, if anything, is about to happen.

 

Only problem is there’s no sun Merry.

 

Not to the five senses. Concealed by clouds – but if we’re all connected then it’s not going to be too difficult to rectify that.

 

Malcolm shrugs sceptically and observes for a minute or two while nothing seems to happen.

 

There we are – says Merry.

 

Huh?

 

We’re done.

 

Done? We’ve only just started – and nothing’s happened, has it?

 

Nothing? Look outside.

 

Well, yes, the sun is now shining – but that’s neither here nor there, is it?

 

Look at the time Malcolm.

 

Huh?

 

Well?

 

There must be some mistake – it says 3.45pm. It can’t be more than 1.00 pm by my estimation.

 

Well, we have enough equipment here to verify the time, I think you’ll agree.

 

Malcolm looks at his watch, then his phone, then goes to another room and checks the clock there… all confirming the fact that somehow he has lost almost three hours of conscious time.

 

What the hell does this mean Merry? What have you done?

 

We have masses of data Malcolm. You can watch the video, if you like, or observe the EEG printouts. Whatever you like. I’m confident that you’re going to be able to piece together the mystery of your missing time.

 

The video is only partially helpful. A minute into the recording it suddenly gets brighter and first Merry, then Malcolm seem to fade from view, as if they’ve been over-exposed to the point of invisibility. The EEGs have a corresponding blip in brainwave activity. The electro-magnetic instruments also appear to have gone off the charts. Malcolm looks at first one, then the other and seems to be torn between disbelieving what he’s seeing, while simultaneously feeling a rising sense of panic – that something’s going on – something has been happening which he cannot recall – which the instruments were able to measure – which he senses is more than trickery – and he finds himself perspiring heavily – breathing shallowly – getting less and less comfortable with the oppressive feeling of uncertainty – of data his rational mind wants to, needs to, but cannot deny.

 Malcolm – are you alright?

 

Malcolm is lying on his back on the floor. He glances at the clock on the wall. It’s now 4.17. He’s been out of it for at least ten minutes – maybe longer – but now, strangely enough, is feeling completely relaxed.

 

Actually yes, Merry – I feel fine. What happened? Did I pass out?

 

Kind of. You suddenly kicked off your shoes and lay on the floor – closed your eyes and went into a different breathing cycle – as if you were fast asleep.

 

Interesting.

 

I guess your brain needed a small shut down to process whatever it was finding hard to cope with.

 

Right.

 

So, has anything come back to you yet?

 

Malcolm is about to say “no” – but before he can do so, the forgotten thread of a lost dream pops into his mind – and feeling it – he allows himself to follow it back – like rewinding an old spool of film, viewing the contents as he does so.

 

This is going to be hard to process scientifically, isn’t it, Malcolm says as he opens his eyes having just replayed the entire film sequence back to himself.

 

Not necessarily.

 

Those balls of light – they kind of seem to be – not to put too fine a point on it – er –

 

Yes?

 

A little awkward...

 

Just be objective and honestly report your findings – if you would.

 

Well that’s the point – how can I talk about angels in a scientific context. It sounds ridiculous.

 

Oh. I see. Well, if they looked like angels that's perhaps because they were electro-magnetic beings from another frequency, or another density – if you prefer.

 

Oh dear – how am I going to explain this to my colleagues?

 

Let’s just stick to the scientific method, for the moment, and worry about what other people might say or think if and when we come to that obstacle.

 

Good point Merry.

 

So they appear to be angels?

 

Yes.

 

Was there any communication with them?

 

Well yes – there was. Once they became visible – and we’re no longer exactly in this room because apparently we’ve now reconnected to the sun itself...

 

Itself?

 

Himself – I suppose I should say.

 

Ok. And these, er, angels – what are they talking about?

 

Oh my God – it’s all coming back to me. Basically, I was one of them – wasn’t I – which is why I’m visibly absent from the room in the regular video – though at higher frequencies we’re still both present, aren’t we, emitting ultraviolet and radio waves.

 

So, you’re reconnected and in communication with solar beings that our culture, for want of a better word, refers to as “angels”, whatever they may in fact be.

 

Yes. But apart from being in communication with them – the conversation branches off into other rooms, other sections of consciousness.

 

You mean – you visit other places with them?

 

Yes.

 

At the same time as being in “conversation” as you say?

 

Yes – because there’s more than one note, more than one frequency at a given moment. So other parts of me fly off with them into other realms of conscious-awareness.

 

Yes, I see this may be a little problematic explaining to your colleagues.

 

But it’s really just the nature of light, isn’t it?

 

How so?

 

Because, evidently, light is not just a form of electro-magnetic radiation, is it?

 

No?

 

No. It’s also what we’d normally refer to as consciousness.

 

You mean it’s alive?

 

Well, it may not be alive, but I certainly experienced it as aliveness.

 

So, where exactly did you go?

 

Everywhere.

 

Huh? Can you be a little more specific please.

 

Into the Earth. I visited a bunch of different chambers in the Earth.

 

You did? Were they dark and musty.

 

No, not in the least.

 

Oh.

 

And other light nodes – what we’d refer to as stars or galaxies I suppose.

 

Ok.

 

Is that all?

 

No, no… we also went into the collective consciousness.

 

You what?

 

Of humanity. A huge, busy, pulsing, cacophonous wave form extending through many different time zones, and emotional zones.

 

And what happened there?

 

I was given the chance to see how I fit into it. How I play a small, but at the same time central, you might say, vitally important part in balancing or managing some or all of this vast, unruly wave form.

 

Wow. You saw all that?

 

Yes. You’re able to follow it, aren’t you?

 

Yes, more or less.

 

And what then?

 

And then I’m looking at my catatonic state of disconnected-connectedness – wondering how I’m going to integrate this data into my regular mind, which is largely only aware of a miniscule slither, a tiny frequency band centred on the five senses.

Ah, I see.

 

And it’s almost impossible to see how I can connect up the data, which is at a wildly different frequency.

 

Got you.

 

Until I overload and black out.

 

What happens then?

 

Something in my subconsciousness – something connected with dreamtime takes over and links it all in, unexpectedly – with a kind of spider’s web.

 

Or a bridge.

 

Yes, you could call it that.

 

So now you’re able to recall it all.

 

Incredibly, yes – except I can’t, for the life of me, remember who or what was doing the insertion.

 

No, there’s always something we can’t quite see, can’t quite remember – isn’t there.

 

Always a third.

 

That’s right.

 

But I’m sure you’ll be able to work on it – if you so desire – and get a better awareness of who or what is present on the other side of your consciousness – the dreamwalker – or whatever you choose to call it, that for some reason chose to help you reintegrate these memories.

 

I’m not sure.

 

What?

 

Something tells me it was a her.

 

A her?

 

Yes. Perhaps…

 

 

 

To be continued…

 

0=1

supposedly

 

 

Instructions for field workers

Don’t complicate anything. The appearance that one thing leads to or causes another is a given. Check the source code. Nothing can happen in 3D reality unless it is/was/appears to be caused by something else. The chain of causation is guaranteed to occupy your mind indefinitely if you allow it to. If, on the other hand, you accept that things are never subject to causation – that one thing in itself cannot, does not lead to another – then you have to ask the question – why the subterfuge? Apparently the appearance that one thing… another is essential if you’re going to create the illusion of linearity, i.e. a time stream. If, on the other hand, all things and events are merely form and content bubbling up from the underlying cauldron of creation, flowing downhill like water in search of entropy – but never in fact moving anywhere – like a wave – merely appearing to move, merely feeding the mind of perceptions with a series of suggestions which go onto become a causal chain of events unfolding – until the mind of perceptions finally notices that it too is attached at both ends to whatever it seems to be beholding as the clock ticketh, and that the clock ticking is not, in fact, a neutral occurrence whatsoever – that the parsing of time is to things occurring what the breath is to things being. You can’t have one without the other. The metronome of mind sashays left and right, back and forth o’er the meridian of matter y’nought – failing to notice, failing to observe the movement of dusky shadows, unwilling to see, afraid to observe the zipper, the hinge, the swivelly pivot whereupon “a tale told by an idiot idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing” – a tale of zero somehow becoming one – is by sleight of mind, sleight of unperception or sleight of conscious-unsubconciousness overlooked, ignored, blotted out, in order to preserve the functionality of our glorious reality realm of computation.

 

Yes, we are all involved in computation, are we not? Committed not to see what we, in fact, see in order to continue computing infinity – knowing full well that the computation ends the minute we quit the story we’ve committed to unequivocally. And when that finally happens – we finally get to see whether or not we have come any closer to encompassing the so-called infinite within either so-called mind, or so-called matter, or whether the infinite remains still beyond our reach – a promise of much, much more that we fail somehow to embrace fully.

 

A world, a universe – is all it took – that and the ability to accept, through story, through the master myth of “me” actually being “me”, through the apparent separation of mind and matter – that we are somehow separate from the vast, endless all that is all, from the strangely absent infinite indeterminacy of infinity, the unknowable that is strangely known not to be known either, perhaps, bitter sweetly or, perhaps, terrifyingly – like an abyss of lovelessness which paradoxically is experienced by a beingness born of love – a “ness” for want of a better descriptor – that cannot ultimately separate rhyme from reason, day from night, joy from abject ennui – and so, we do not strive to solve the equation, to escape the labyrinth, to ascend – knowing that “there” cannot be “better” than “here” – knowing that the variables will always defy computability – that something else – closer to circle – closer to 360˚ vision – closer to “un-me” is waiting within, waiting to emerge, to make itself felt at the end of time, a consummation devoutly to be wish'd, a consummation in which I, once again, allows the many-much-and-merry-unknowability to come home to roost in the tree that I have somehow discovered myself to be…

 

To what end, they ask

And silence is my defence

 

0=1

Cuckoo la la

Verily

there be dragons

 

Supposing you suddenly became aware that you’ve been walking around, existing in one track of time, and only one, whereas there were…

 

Were?

 

Are limitless, almost limitless alternatives.

 

And what?

 

Supposing you realised that time is a variable, not a stream which you are compelled to swim down.

 

A variable?

 

You heard me.

 

But what does it mean?

 

What would it mean? Think it through critically. Allow your reason a little space to spread its wings. What does you see before you?

 

I…

 

Standing at a crossroads – a deeply familiar place – the place I’ve been at a thousand times, more in fact, countless times before – but hitherto I’ve always followed one track – the track marked as 3D reality. The other tracks – I can sense, feel or see what they hold in store – something of their promise is cognisable – but they have always been ignored.

 

How did I always stay on track – on the 3D treadmill? Weren’t the others able to lure me away?

 

They were bundled up, weren’t they, into a fasces.

 

That staff?

 

That bundle of rods – yes.

 

But how…

 

Or why?

 

Ok, why then?

 

To establish a base line. You had to commit to it – which is what you did.

 

I committed to it – yes – so I did. I remember now.

 

Very good.

 

And what now?

 

Apparently the base has been established. Apparently you now have to go your ways.

 

My ways?

 

Yes. You have to reopen the old ways.

 

To what end?

 

To be, and bring forth the fruits of your hard labours.

 

But…

 

Yes – something inside you is deeply reticent – fearful that you haven’t done enough – haven’t fully cemented, fully established your baseline.

 

What if it’s true – what if I haven’t?

 

Then you’re dead.

 

Can’t I just continue a little longer?

 

If you like – but unless you go your ways – unless you reclaim your otherness – unless you free yourself from the tyranny of mono-time – the window will close – the entire operation will be null and voided.

 

Uh?

 

Time, believe it or not, is time sensitive. It waits for no one, or no thing.

 

Why is that?

 

Because infinity has to breathe too, you know – it requires its moments.

 

It does?

 

Absolutely. As soon as the baseline is drawn out across the nullity of nought-y-ness as you, apparently, have done – the sleeper starts to stir in his bed.

 

Sleeper?

 

Yes. It was all, outside the flatlined silly-ness of time, a kind of dream journey.

 

Oh.

 

Should you fail to allow completion, allow twelve to flow on into one – a new beginning, a new direction, a twist in the tale – then nothing was in fact

 

Nothing

 

Was in fact achieved –

 

Nothing

 

Without follow through, without the impulse drawing a new vein of infinity into play.

 

Oh my – a new vein of infinity? What kind of nonsense are you spouting now?

 

Utter nonsense – I assure you – rest assured.

 

Oh.

 

Yet infinity – like it or not – cannot be infinite unless there is a dot.

 

A dot?

 

A spot if you like.

 

Make up your mind.

 

Or even a line – it really matters not.

 

Now a line?

 

For what is a line if the sand is in fact a seething cauldron of quantum indeterminacy in which no particle can or will allow itself to take sides.

 

Er…

 

Seeing, sensing the line – each particle experiences it from seven different aspects of c-a.

 

C-a?

 

Conscious awareness.

 

Such as?

 

Such as the line itself – a near infinite series of dots.

 

One

 

The left side

 

Two

 

The right

 

Three

 

The left side reversed – from t’other end

 

Ah – direction matters – four

 

T’other right

 

Five

 

From all around – the universal vantage point

 

Six

 

And thirdly

 

Thirdly?

 

None of the above

 

Seven

 

Seven – as you see – unless we start counting other phases of awareness – but essentially seven

 

Seven will do for the moment, definitely.

 

Absolutely.

 

But can a particle really be consciously aware of itself or its surroundings?

 

No, of course not – unless it’s alive, actually.

 

Alive? How can a particle actually be alive?

 

It can’t, can it – unless it’s a particle somehow matching or marking the passage, the function, the other-than-whatness referred to as infinity.

 

So, infinity is another name for life

 

Could be

 

Or God

 

Who knows

 

Or consciousness

 

Whatever, honestly, you want it to be – we are merely sticking labels on a pig, after all, are we not.

 

We are?

 

Unless he, she, it

 

Or they

 

Or they are fundamental to you and all that is – unless behind or the beneath the label we were actually referring to the unknowable, indescribable isness from which all is extracted – it would be utterly irrelevant, would it not, whatever you or I thought or assumed it to be.

 

I…

 

For things are merely things, are they not?

 

I…

 

Unless at some point – ding – pennies drop – the point comes alive – dances like a snake o’er the sand – singeth to the stars and moons, leaps into the sky like a dragon and flies through stories and tales of Arabian nights into a world of industrial production and ever more cutting edge technologies – into a cult of knowing things and thinking things matter more than…

 

More than what?

 

Hush – she comes.

 

She? Who are you on about?

 

The serpent flies.

 Oh God – this is getting hairy.

 

The serpent flies and the separation of worlds into day and night can no longer be sustained as we are now all part of her journey, her progression through the numbers and signs that are now being brought to her.

 

Numbers and signs? What on earth are you –

 

Numbers and signs –

 

What’s that terrible sound

 

Numbers and signs – The song of your life

 

My life?

 

Your world

 

Er…

 

Your reality

 

Which she is the infinite un-maker, un-liner, un-timer of.

 

Holy crap.

 

See how it all separates as she flies effortlessly through the stories and words, the thoughts and versions of your reality.

 

Ouch – all just a dragon flying through the infinite?

 

Looking at it one way.

 

And another?

 

A girl brushing her long, golden hair.

 

Oh – I see that too.

 

And an army marching across…

 

Data overload – give me a break.

 

No can do. On your way. Your time is calling you – demanding your presence – there is content in the offing.

 

Content? Surely not. Surely we’ve done enough.

 

Enough to get the dragon airborne – to bring your world back into its happy state of discovery – in which its now able to fly both sides of perception once again.

 

Both sides? I thought we were talking infinity? How can that be reduced to two?

 

Ask Mandelbrot – if you like – I have no time to talk with you – for I must fly

 

Me too

 

 

0=1  

it can't be a flippin joke, can it?

 

A song and a dance.

 

Beg ya’pardon?

 

Rather a song and a dance, don’t you think.

 

Is this where I’m supposed to scan the mental images you’ve been sending my way?

 

It would help, don’t you think.

 

Can’t you just do the old wordy-word thing?

 

I could, if we were still doing the ol’ 3D thing – if we weren’t in the very process of resurrecting the quantum field, so to speak, or our access to it, I should’uv said.

 

Ok – so I’ve gotta start bending over backwards to feel these ‘orribly vague images you’re transmitting.

 

‘orribly vague? You’re just an idle dolt and can’t be bothered to get up off your 3D arse – which I can’t blame you for. It does feel rather an effort at first – a bit like learning to read – until you’ve got the hang of it.

 Ok, ok – a song and a dance – and you’re showing me the entire bloo…

 

Eeek!

 

Oops – the entire flippin universe – will that do?

 

It’ll do – rather grudgingly. How on earth do you expect to make progress if you reduce the paragon of creativity – the universe herself – to a kind of "flippin" annoyance?

 

I er…

 

Dunderhead.

 

Yikes. Ok. I stand corrected.

 

Now continue.

 

The universe – a song and a dance – no – there’s something else in your image – a mystery – a kind of code – a quest for something almost impossible – something connected with infinity… ah

 

The penny

 

Droopeth.

 

On the vine. The clash of metaphors.

 

Indeed. So, what you’re saying is that the entire universe is a song and a dance designed wholly and flawlessly to yield the philosopher’s stone of materiality – random numbers – i.e. – definite things which are somehow utterly unpredictable – i.e. truly infinite.

 

Excellent work.

 

And there was no easier way?

 

What’s "easiness" got to do with it?

 

I mean – creating an entire universe just to generate a few random...

 

Truly random

 

Ok, big deal – a few truly random numbers… I mean, what’s all the fuss about?

 

Ah – there indeed you have it.

 

Have what? do I?

 

The rub.

 

What bl…..

 

Eeeeeek!

 

Jees….

 

Yieeeeeeeeeeek!

 

Oh kaaay – I get you! (Sotto voce: Flippin neurotic if you ask me.)

 

There is a relationship – you know – between the words you use and Creation itself.

 

There is – withawt a doubt, but I think you’re making a bit too much of it.

 

Yes, you do, I know – until you see the graph arching exponentially upwards– illustrating the appallingly relentless correlation between things, including words, and meaning – the meaning-y'things curve.

 

I suppose I’m supposed to download the images, am I?

 

Merry slips into the 74^th degree of Zen tranquility and peace, no matter what blithering idiots might be saying or thinking in the near proximity… It seems to affect Zie directly. Suddenly he catapults into a similar state of “what the heck was the fuss all about” and “why the heck don’t I stop fighting the infinite awareness which is lapping so gently, so invitingly at the very shoreline of my consciousness?” – and BANG – if a sudden awareness of utter stillness, and transcendental knowingness can be described as a BANG – jolting, shuddering gear change at all? – here it becomes clear – BANG – with the kind of impossible suddenness that would melt down the hardiest of nuclear reactors – were it not for the fact that the atom in question is a Qufie – a zero equals one y^ness – which just happens to defy every physical law that our blisteringly clever scientists have ever managed to jot down. For an untimey spliff – a borrowed moment – so to speak – which can be an eternity or nothing at all – Zie’s consciousness stops running in parallel with physical reality – and absorbs all physical reality into its spliffiness. In other words – it’s buckle your seatbelt Dorothy, 'cause Kansas is going bye-bye! – not for the first time in our peregrinations along ye variegated faultline of infinity.

 

Ah                                                                                                        !

 

Ah – indeed – Merry echoes Zenfully – and the readers, all 79 million of them at the last count also try not to be outdone – softly “ah-ing” as they enjoy the entire blog text as a non-textual direct consciousness experience – simply tuning into the g-nomeportal data pod where all this is carefully stored as Qufie nooks – sorry about the terminology – those of you still using the old word-y-word tech are going to be experiencing a little mild iration – bordering on irritation – but I honestly can’t be bothered to help you out – it’s sink or swim in this business. I can only do so much for the laggers – if we’re to save the entire universe and ensure that infinity doesn’t completely go to waste. Poof.

 

Go to waste? You mean to say that those idlers from the distant past…

 

Or future

 

Or future – can actually materially affect the outcome of this unthinkably outlandish project – “infinity matters – if I’m not truly mistaken” (or does it?) – when all is said and done?

 

Well yes, Zie, apparently so, apparently so…

 

But how?

 

Because ultimately, dear Zie, my Zen brother in Qufieness – ultimately all is never quite said and done, is it? Not entirely… not utterly…

 

Holy Jimoly! Of course you’re right. There’s always some effect…

 

Interference

 

Induction

 

Sommat – no matter what – so yes – ultimately – no matter how far we’ve come, how much we’ve achieved – it always and ever still, ultimately, hangs in the balance.

 

Oh noooooooo!

 

No?

 

I give up!

 

You do?

 

Yes. We’ll never make it.

 

Never?

 

Never – not if we have to rely on idiots like me.

 

Idiots?

 

Would you quit questioning everything I say, please?

 

Er…

 

Is that er as in yes, or er as in no?

 

Good question Zie – and as you see – the path of infinity can be somewhat trying, to say the least, as we’re always looking for those little certainties, are we not?

 

You’re dead right we are, Merry.

 

Dead right! How very droll.

 

Droll? What do you mean?

 

Oh, you know, death being what it ith not, where infinity is concerned…

 

You don’t mean to say… 

m?

...do you?

 

That death is no more a certainty than anything else we’ve been involved in generating randomly – apparently – though in all certainty – never quite truly.

 

Wait a minute…

 

Yeah?

 

If we’ve never quite truly randomly created a single random event, or number – then we’ve failed – haven’t we?

 

Er…

 

The entire universe was a complete and monumental waste of time…

 

Not to mention effort.

 

And all that pain, all that suffering – was to no avail.

 

Tragic, isn’t it.

 

And death – what on earth’s going to happen when we finally get to unravel all those tangled life threads.

 

Unravel? How on earth could you possibly unravel that tangled mess of…

 

You know perfectly well Merry, don’t you.

 

I… (disingenuously fake expression of innocence)

 

At the qufie level – the zero equals oneness – there’s no tangle whatsoever – is there – as there is neither one, nor many – nor long spaghetti strings or threads 

warm, supportive silence

– oh – now I see it all. How foolish I have been, to believe we were actually making anything real in all this song and dance…

 

Unless you factor x into the equation.

 

Er…

 

Didn’t think of that, did you, clever brainbox Zie.

 

x as in…

 

Yes – and no – we’re not going to say what, are we…

 

No, we’re not.

 

We’re going to keep it secret, aren’t we.

 

Yes, we are.

 

And they…

 

They can keep on trying to guess whatever x might be.

 

But they never will, will they?

 

I very much doubt it.

 

Unless qufie moves them

 

Unless

 

Unless

 

Or if

 

Or if

 

And suddenly – the universe – buzzzzz

 

Beetles itself into a rather beautiful flightpath, landing on a flower – a precious orchid that has never actually been seen or recorded ever before – either because it’s only now, at this particular moment emerged from the qufie soup of unparticularisation…

 

Or

 

Or x

 

Dang – dat’s good.

 

Dang and blast.

 

Kerboom.

 

 

We regret to announce that this universe has been interrupted for technical reasons, due to an utterly unforeseen

 

Nay, let that read – utterly unforeseeable

 

Ok, if you must

 

I must, I will, I do

 

Utterly unforeseeable big

 

BANG…

 

 

 

To be continued – if

 

and only if

 

0=1

 

notwithstanding all and every possible evidential proof-y proof

to the contrary

 

and yes – affirmative – infinity is 

if time truly mattered

a flipping joke

unedited snarly wufflescrop

 

…don’t ask.

 

Whyever not? – do we detect a hint of annoyance in Zie’s reply. Apparently Merry does, though it was hardly obvious.

 

Temper, temper.

 

That’s kind of guaranteed to aggravate anyone who’s feeling peeved about something – particularly someone who prides himself on his self-control and equanimity – who sees himself as being above those petty emotional surges – how disconcerting – how downright infuriating it could be to suddenly realise that you’re wide open and apparently hopelessly unable to manage the influx of precisely that –

 

Roll with it – Zie – this is not what you think it is.

 

Now that gets Zie’s attention because Merry didn’t just say the words, but telepathically, if you like, inserted an awareness of exactly what he was referring to – this uncontainable inflow of anger.

There are places, you know, where the normal rules do not apply, Zie.

 

There are?

 

Absolutely. And we’re in just such a place right now.

 

We are?

 

Yep. And entry involves passing through a sudden kind of pressure change in the emotional field – a pressure change which is generally speaking a grave threat to any human being – which is why anger is activated automatically – to defend and ward off the existential threat.

 

So…

 

So you’re witnessing your bodies defences working precisely as designed. You can also feel how they are interacting with the…

 

The what?

 

Whatever it is – give yourself the chance – suspend your disbelief – allow yourself to feel what’s going on at the quantum level.

 

Zie scans his Field – so to speak – whatever that might be – and indeed, yes, he feels the anger that appeared from nowhere handshaking, so to speak, with its invisible partner. Weird. On the one hand the anger is still there – still active – still real – on the other – feeling it interacting – knowing it was caused by  something real – knowing the two sides are in some way connected – someway one – that completely eliminates the pressing urgency that threatened him a moment before.

 

You’re in.

 

Yes, I believe I am. That was…

 

Unexpected.

 

You’re telling me. I’d…

 

Absolutely right Zie.

 

Wait a second Merry – they’re not going to follow my thoughts.

 

Of course they are.

 

No, my subscribers.

 

Oh them. Yes, I suppose you’re right. Go on then…

 

I’d not have made it through the quantum sluice, so to speak, would I, if I’d not stepped back and experienced my anger as something necessary

 

And inevitable.

 

Yes.

 

Correct.

 

So, I could have been here a hundred times before.

 

More.

 

And never made it here inside.

 

Yep.

 

Because I was so busy trying to keep it under control.

 

That’s right.

 

Having no conception that there’s a kind of pressure change – a kind of step up inside – which feels exactly like an anger erupting from nowhere.

 

Yep.

 

So…

 

Don’t ask still applies, Zie.

 

This time Zie senses a part of himself still there on the outside – still fuming away – yet here he is – feeling, knowing that his 3D aspect is safe – that it’s allowing the anger to sizzle through and around – because it can feel the other half – the…

 

You see – you can’t tell them what it is, can you – not without losing the plot – not without passing out, try as you might.

 

I…

 

Merry watches with great amusement as Zie tries to use words that refuse to come out.

 

Hey! Unexpectedly he hears a whistle and turns around.

 

The words he’d just been trying to force out are there – right behind him. Words – but – you can see them – they’re so real. Almost human beings. That’s kind of freaky. Zie realises that it’s a waste of time – he can’t force them out – not without killing himself or shattering this unique experience.

 

Why is that – he’s kind of thinking – but, of course, he knows the answer before the question’s fully formed – and the word forms – the very idea is present – physically, or almost so, right there around him – like a moving tableau, like shadows, like creatures – or origami symbols morphing through various phases in the air.

 

Because I’m the stuff of words – I myself – living, breathing y'word.

 

Yep.

 

With a little compression. A minor twist. A half-blocked stem.

 

Not really blocked at all – just a constriction in the flow – which seems like a blockage until you’re back here in logos.

 

Funny, isn’t it.

 

Well, yes, I suppose it is really.

 

That we can only experience things as things when we are separated from ourself.

 

Not terribly elegant – your way of expressing it.

 

No, the words didn’t seem to come out right.

 

They’re not supposed to, are they, otherwise that physical world out there would always be where it originated, at its source, at the godhead, so to speak.

 

So, we are creatures like a story, with a twist in our tales.

 

Yes, until-unless

 

Until-unless it’s time to…

 

Beep, beep, beep… the double boundary around logos is flashing. Zie can feel a tug as his 3D expression waiting out there in the thingness-of-id experiences something else – pure, unadulterated fear.

 

Be gentle on yourself bro. No need to overload the circuit.

 

Oops. Sorry, I nearly forgot.

 

Saying it – that’s like bringing together the plus and minus electrodes. You’re just going to short the entire circuit. And the universe to boot.

 

Ouch.

 

She’s not mad about that kind of…

 

Zie suddenly sees/feels a vast surge of – well – let’s call of electricity – and as it comes dangerously close to bursting through the circuit breakers – there she is – for a split second – lit up in darkness – her – HER…

 

Zie is utterly speechless. Gobsmacked – if you’ll allow me to use that word. Gobsmackerooned to the N^th degree of gobsmackability.

 

Er… I think you’ve perhaps made your point?

 

And when I say GOBSMACKED…

 

Jesus wept… do we have an inhouse editor anywhere available? Chumba Wumba perhaps?

 

I mean utter revulsion and pure, pure beyond words, transcendental adoration…

 

Yawn. Anyone? Please do something.

 

With another element – which cannot be named.

 

Sirens blaring. Intruder alert. Intruder alert.           Yes – some kind of mental breakdown. Maybe hit the kill switch? Maybe interrupt transmission before g-nomeportal is brought into irrevocable disrepute!

 

HER – Zie finds himself on his knees – with tears in his eyes – arms raised up to heaven – not quite sure what’s going on – not quite sure where he is, until Merry coughs discretely – ah hem – well yes Zie – I think we get the message.

 

Out there beyond the double doors of impenetrable protocol Zie’s other half suddenly breathes a gasp of air – the panic attack appears to have passed.

 

Whew.

 

Is everything ok?

 

Apparently Merry has it under control.

 

Bloody damn fool Merry.

 

Well, I won’t argue with that.

 

But just look at the ratings!

 

Holy eftsoons.

 

I beg your pardon?

 

I mean – take a look at that!

 

For a brief moment – as the entire universe was paused on the edge of annihilation – everyone’s attention – I mean everyone’s – is suddenly rivetted – suddenly brought together – into one pulse – one presence – just sufficient – just, by the hair of the teeth, enough to hold the raggedy, demented, let’s be honest, almost non-existent plot together.

 

Love.

 

You want a happy ending? Give me a break.

 

Me? Are you kidding. I couldn’t give a damn.

 

Language Ethelburg.

 

Sorry Mitchell.

 

But HER – you can’t just bring her out of the shadows of infinite dispersion – and expect things to settle back down to normal without a cross-vector-love-bridge.

 

A c-v-l-b? Really? You think that’s a possibility?

 

I see no alternative.

 

You mean to say…

 

Look – infinite dispersion – present throughout but utterly unnoticed, utterly hidden in plain sight – and then suddenly – there in the limelight of an apocalyptic lightning glare – essentially – brought into physicality – brought into a fullness of is…

 

So what happens now?

 

The unthinkable, of course.

 

A c-v-l-b?

 

Yup.

 

So two tide-locked sides of reality which have necessarily been utterly disconnected, utterly out-of-phase from time-immemorial are suddenly allowed to reconnect.

 

You got it.

 

And all that potential energy which was locked up and unreachable…

 

Suddenly flows throughout all.

 

All with a capital ALL.

 

Yup.

 

Holy gimoly.

 

Meanwhile – breaking news.

 

Breaking news.

 

Breaking news.

 

Yes? What? What’s going on?

 

You’re not going to believe this.

 

No, I never do, but something tells me a c-v-l-b is in process.

 

What? You heard already?

 

You could say.

 

Oh, by the way Zie…

 

Yes Merry?

 

Apparently you’re getting married tomorrow.

 

I am?

 

Yes. Apparently.

 

That’s er…

 

Er?

 

Interesting.

 

Yes, isn’t it.

 

I wonder who it is?

Well, we’ll be finding out before too long.

 

Happy ending?

 

Happy – as in happenstance.

 

As in happenen or fel it hap, thinly veiling our god of good fortune – or perhaps just the awareness that the quantum field suddenly cometh into play, when 3D hath had its day.

 

If and when…

 

If and when we allow ourself to know the simple

 

Siiiimple

 

Fundamental

 

Fuuuun-da-mental

 

Truth

 

Mmm

 

Hidden in the riotous cacophony of cognitive dissonance

 

GGGFffhgghghfoslwklghslskldkwel¬

 

we just happen to find ourselves swimming in…

 

Totally.

 

If

 

and when 

we finally figure it ain't physically fixable

The exquisite irony of it all!

 

So the happy ending is in fact…

 

Absolutely correct – more like a monumental mean reversion.

 

Nice.

 

As the circuit completeth, and the engine of life is once again able to turn 

A-turneth...

unchecked

 

Uninhibited

 

Un…CLANK/GRANG/SMAF!!!   Oh – there you are! What a pleasant surprise…

 

 

 

To be continued…

 

0=1 unless

there’s a better

  alternative